Once upon a passed out rock star... Yesterday was weird. I've learned a harsh few lessons in life in the last few days. Firstly....I am not hardcore drinker girl, and I honestly can say that after last night, I am going to be a social drinker (a glass of wine or two) from here on out, and nothin' else. I'm tired of this cyclically getting trashed thing, and my body hates me for it when I do it.

Also, I've realized (again, via knocks) that it is a bit of a trap to start hanging out with the locals in the building in my offtime. I do really enjoy the company of a lot of people in our building, and like hanging out with them on occasion, but when it comes to drinking....they outclass me, and it's a whole other scary level of vice city that I don't want anything to do with, if that makes sense. I don't want to hang out with people that make a life long pursuit of this, because I sure as hell don't want to, or want others to think that of me. The other thing is...it is way too distracting from my own life to be constantly going over to "so and so's" for a coffee, a beer, whatever-- and it happens too much lately.

Last night, picture if you will, three of us impoverished louts of my building, being invited for free boozing and movies on a big screen tv in a VERY high end condo on 109th that only had one opening window and a quarter centimeter of dust over everything. But also picture me driving this guy (our host) home from our apartment's restaurant, because he was so incredibly drunk, with the two aqquaintances in the back, with a 200 lb rotteweiler in tow (a big sucky gentle rotteweiler named Benny). Next, picture our host- lonely, irresponsible, stupid and trusting, too much money, and desperate for a fuck. It was distinctly sketchy (basically one of many party pads of this guy). I was incredibly reluctant to go, but had I not gone, my female aquaintance would have been alone with two men, albeit one of them being extremely trustworthy and well...built.

Picture now, (as this starts looking like a bad movie) the host chasing around my friend all night copping a feel as everyone gets progressively drunker. I'm bored, extremely uncomfortable, have a cold, and the movie of choice was Super Troopers, so I end up playing with Benny and analyzing bad art deco that he spent way too much money on. But yet, I did drink, despite it all. I don't think though that it was so much how much, but what (Tequila, rum, and later, white wine) we were drinking.

In the end, I had a fucking lame time, and I did not sober up until about 1 pm today (read: 90% through my typography class). I really can't stand drinking anymore. I still love wine and always will, but I'm incredibly tired of overdoing it. So, I'm done. At the same time though, it is just me. I don't give a shit if other people do it, especially if they're having fun, and that'll never change...but it's really starting to gross me out when I do it.

In other different news....our magazine project in Typo, is this beautiful totally inspired thing that I came up with. The more we work on it, the more it falls together magically and awesomely. It's going to be amazing. Everytime I sit down to work on it, I think to myself that if I don't get this computer program, I very well might ...be unfulfilled. It's that fucking fun. And the magazine idea itself....it would need a lot of tweaking and modifications I would make if I were sans partner for the project...but it's pretty feasible for a small scale production idea. I really like the content. My partner for the project is really rad though too... We're very much on the same level of thinking, but she's an organizational nazi and much more practical than I am, so she keeps me in line too, lol. Plus, she's just fun to talk to.

Today, tour buses were parked in front of the Rose and Crown Pub....and lo and behold, I got to see Rob Zombie, from a distance. My super actually talked to the guy, but was like, "Oh, I don't know who Rob Zombie is--durrr..." I'm not a huge fan myself, either, but...le boy is, so...I might be in the bad books. He's already sort of choked at how many of his favorite bands come here. Of course, the feasible thing would be to thus move here and live with the girlthing...but...it's a tough sell, lol.

Fuck...I just finished talking to my parents, and man am I all of a sudden homesick. City life has been amazingly repulsive to me lately. I'm getting tired of seeing people treat people like shit, and people live like shit, and feeling so....harried and hectic.  ¶ 10:55 PM